Ads you can feel! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Apple has a track record of excellence with just about every campaign, and the iPod series is no exception. Here's proof that it's a smashing success: I've been so jaded with what passes for "music" these days that I've actively avoided anything "new" for a couple of years now. Including U2, who I used to love, until Bono became convinced he's the second coming of the messiah. Anyway, it is through the iPod ads that I've had that catchy "Vertigo" tune incised into my consciousness (Hola! Donde Esta?). And against my will, too. That's effective advertising.

And it's not just having the star power of this legendary band that makes these ads jump off the screen. The series actually started with silhouetted dancers doing their gyrating moves against a saturated color backdrop, an iPod draped around their necks, and samples of their favorite music blaring in the audio. In the U2 spot, they got the "contrast" toned down so you could actually make out their faces. Still, the unmistakably distinctive production wins half the battle: every time you see these ads, you KNOW who it is, and what the product is. The energy of the spots might actually be greater than that of the music that's pumped out of the product, depending on your musical tastes.

It's catchy, it's exciting, it's powerful, and it's part of a master marketing plan. That goes for U2, too... I learned that they refused money for appearing in this spot, knowing that the success of the iPod and the exposure of this hit tune would remunerate them during their upcoming tour. Hmmm... and Bono's lobbying for Director of the World Bank, too... maybe he is a divine entity after all.

What's the secret? Impact.

Here's a long-running campaign that really has legs. IBM's series of technology and service ads. These spots, by Ogilvy & Mather, have been running for the last 5 years or more, and are among the few tech ads done by consumer agencies that are as intelligent as the market they target, that correctly identify the problem (never to be assumed with tech advertising!) and the benefit/solution, and that have true staying power and impact.

The first thing that sets these head and shoulders above everyone else's is that ingenious blue vertical border. Not only does it give the entire series a steady visual anchor, it also reinforces the IBM "blue" branding; all without wasting a single second or a single screen of superimposed text. Seeing this graphic element in every spot, even when the product line or creative strategy changes, instantly tells the viewer who's talking to him; we've got the "wireless and Blade" guys, the cable-jiggling office drones, and in this latest spot, an old man with a GREAT idea in a small lockbox who needs assistance from the IBM Helpdesk to grow his business. But, you know that all of them are IBM ads before you even get near the punchline.

These latest spots are a little too precious in their dialogue, with those cute little statements that wrap things up in a perfect, stepfordesque "bow" (kind of like those yuppie abominations you'd see on every woman's blouse in the '90s). But, even so, they're among the smartest advertising out there.

Ad Spots of the Corn

These spots for Mattress World, a local seller of bedding equipment, have got to be the creepiest I've ever seen. As a repeating tag, the spot cuts from the husband-n-wife proprieters who deliver the usual boring specials-spiel, to a short sequence where a young, towheaded boy stands over a storeroom display mattress. Sleeping on the mattress, and looking rather like bloating road kill, is a supposedly "cute" little toddler boy.

The older kid puts a finger to his lips and harshly hisses, "Shhhhhh....". But instead of inspiring "awwww" from all the mommies watching, the untrained lad comes off like Damien's half-brother.

Or perhaps Dennis the Menace after being in juvenile hall a summer too many. The boy's face contorts into a mask that's hiding a sinister plot to smother the young brother when the camera's not looking (and you know MW has pillows nearby). Even worse, as the camera pans down to the victim tot splayed out on the mattress, the older boy's hand is lowered, and curls back and under like some kind of claw.

Eerily reminiscent of that classic black and white Nosferatu footage of the ghoul stealing into a house at night, his misshapen hands casting nightmarish shadows on the wall.

All this only takes about 2 seconds of air time, but it's so creepy, so skin-crawling that it dominates each and every Mattress World spot. My wife and I refer to the family as "The Corns", a homage to that awful "Children of the Corn" series about cult kids gone bad. The "parents" we call Bob and Betty Corn. The evil kid? He doesn't have a name: it's just, "The Corn Boy". The toddler doesn't have a name either, because we're convinced he's long since dead.

These spots have been running for years now, and the "actor" kids are likely grown up quite a bit. I wonder how the family sees these ads now. They give me the creeps.

Mighty Wingman

Wow, do I have to go back nearly two years for the last ad I really liked?

This one's the closest thing I've seen to perfect in a long time.



We have an acoustic guitar armed singer crooning a tune about how "mighty wingman" is the guy who keeps an overtalkative girl busy while his buddy hits on the gorgeous girl. "Taking one for the team, so your buddy can live the dream.' Pure testosterone, but it is amazingly spot on. Guys do use wingman tactics in the dating game. And this ad never gets old. It ran in steady rotation during the Stanley Cup (remember that?) and basketball playoffs and I actively looked forward to seeing it every single time.

The lyrics are funny, the tune is actually listenable, and the casting and acting are impeccable. If this one didn't sweep some awards show somewhere, something is wrong.



The only minor quibble I can find is that, besides the tag at the very end, there's no reason to remember Coors Light specifically; in the badly lit club, placement isn't real effective. But, with these p*sswater beers, how do you ever remember any of 'em?

Standing "O" or "Oh, brOTHER"?

I can't figure these Overstock.com spots out.

OK, we have our "hot librarian" spokesredhead cooing about all the stuff you can get from Overstock.com. "It's all about the O", she purrs, looking seductively into the camera. The all-white sets and props give the spots a definite look of their own, and contrast the bright red O logo and the red hair and reddish flesh tones, too.

Now, this is about as subtle as a two-by-four upside the head. "The O" is so double entendre that it comes to mind in the reverse order that's intended. These aren't going to "trick" us hard-up guys into buying the same way, say, Playboy magazine got us to subscribe by saying "Oh, I read it for the articles". (Yeah, there was a time I actually said that...)

And all these come-hither glances to sell me books, video, electronics and things? Come ON, I might be nerdish at times, but am I really that shallow? I don't think so, because these spots, visual candy though they are, don't even come close to getting me to actually shop at Overstock. I browsed there once, just to see what was up (so to speak)... no spokesmodel anywhere. ???? I Google'd around to find out who the hottie is. OK, so they got my, uhm, investigative juices flowing. And when the spots come on, I don't exactly look away. I mean, c'mon, the lady's kinda hot... But, it isn't gonna translate into sales. If I need a book, I'm still gonna go to Amazon (what an ironic name for a competitor).

So, anyway, here's where I am with these spots: confused. My wife thinks a WOMAN wrote these, and thinks they're genius. She thinks they're pulling just the right strings, and saying just the right predictable things to us "so easy to manipulate" guys. She also admits to having done a little snooping around at the site, and is actually much more likely than I am to purchase there.

I say they're attention getting (a plus), and you do remember the name of the site (another big plus that a LOT of ads don't have going for them) and the ads have created a LOT of buzz on the net that amounts to free additional exposure (among us bloggers, for one thing) but not effective in generating sales (perhaps THE biggest negative for a campaign for an e-commerce site). So I can't decide HOW I should rate these. Now, perhaps if this is part of a master marketing plan to get mindshare first, and then get us to buy later down the road... then they might be onto something of a masterstroke. Guess we'll have to see.

Go See Cal

I first saw examples of these ads when I lived in the Los

Angeles area. The perpetrator was none other than Cal

Worthington. Or I should say, "Cal Worthington and his dog,

Spot", who was an elephant, a bear, anything but a dog. Cal

was this transplanted Texan who, the ads claimed in a

sing-song jingle would "stand upon my head til my ears were

turning red" to make you a deal. These would run almost

non-stop on the "off channel" networks, during breaks in

bad movies, divorce court TV shows and other visual

detritus.


from http://www.mydogspot.com/scrapbook.htm

They must've been successful, because they ran year after

year, bad afternoon after bad afternoon. And Worthington's

car empire always seemed to be thriving. So, I guess they can't be that bad.

Another example of how mediocre and stupid continues to pervade our culture.

It wasn't until I moved to another city and saw some other

shmo doing the same type of shtick to sell lemons, er, used

cars, that I came to the realization that this was some

sort of national franchise concept. Bottom of the barrel

production values, usually shot on the lot. Ego-driven

owner shown doing stunts or screaming into the camera about

how he can sell YOU a car, no matter what your credit

status, no matter how much down, no matter what. Was the

implied threat, "If you don't, I'll keep running these ads

over and over"?

So now I wonder, who was the original car dealership owner to

stoop to this classic lowbrow approach? What was his

shtick? Did he have a jingle? Stunt animal? Scantily

dressed bimbos? Anybody know?

Spots & Stains: The Rankings

I'm going to use a fairly simple scoring system here. For the
good ads, (or at worst, the marginally acceptable, I'll use the "Spot" icon. In that case, we'll use the word "spot" the same way you'd say "shot" to a guy in your foursome who just dropped his ball within a few inches of the flagstick from 150 yards.




For the bad and the ugly, we'll use the "Stain".


I started out thinking I'd use various flavors of spots and stains, but I'll keep the rating icons to a minimum and let the narrative detail how good or how bad I think the spots are.

After These Messages From Our Sponsors...

Welcome to my advertising industry blog, where I'll discuss
the spots I see come crashing through the TV set every day.
The ones that stink, and the ones that make me blink.

Why? OK, OK, I have to fess up to a certain amount of bitterness. I'm
an advertising creative myself. In my many years of
writing, I've never actually had a TV spot produced. I came
close a time or two, but budget constraints or a change in
plan precluded me ever being able to say I had a "reel" to
go along with my "book"; a book being one's portfolio of
samples. My book is crammed with full color ads, some
double truck ads, some direct mail, some brochures, some
corporate capabilities pieces, and even some radio... but
alas, no TV. So, you might say I'm jealous of those who do
have a "reel" to speak of.
No, that's not quite it. Just like with all those other
types of ads, I feel that, given the client and the
opportunity, I could do a lot better than what passes for
"creative" TV ad spots these days. Sure, there are also
some that make me say, 'Wow, I wish I'd thought of
that'.... but I can truthfully admit the kind of ad genious
that I would not have been able to come up with given the
same blank sheet of paper. This blog will be to give credit
for those ads, too.